I suppose because I’m with a woman at the moment, I’d describe myself as a lesbian, but I like that whole idea of describing myself as fluid, and I don’t like being put in a box; I never have. I was with a man before, so some people might call me bisexual. Personally, I’d rather describe myself as just me.
Once I left high school, I just started hanging around with people who had very liberal ideas about things. I was in a feminist group when I left university and I think that helped me a lot, to not judge people for who they were and to accept everybody for what they wanted to be.
This is the first serious relationship I’ve had with a woman that’s lasted any length of time. When I told my mother, she wasn’t very happy about it, and I was surprised at that reaction as I always thought she was a lot more open-minded. She accepts my partner, and she certainly likes my partner, but I don’t think she particularly likes the idea of my partner being a woman. However, she still embraces my partner in terms of having her over, in the same way she has with my other partners. I think it’s something that has to have time and I think with time it will just improve.
It’s quite extraordinary really, because no one seems to be particularly surprised or judgmental at work. I introduced it slowly when it came up, rather than making a point of it, because it’s my private life. The reason I’ve been in that workplace for so long is because the people are broadminded and they don’t judge people and I think we’ve established a relationship between myself and my work colleagues that works really well, and so who I’m sleeping with is not relevant to the way I work. The point is that I don’t surround myself with people who are narrow-minded and who are frightened of things.
If anything, my current relationship has just broadened my social circle, because I’ll go to places that are different, bars for women or whatever, and perhaps other lesbians might feel more comfortable being friends with me because I am a lesbian now. I think I’m the same person essentially. I don’t think my sexuality affects a lot of things at all because it’s just a part of my life. It just happens to be who I’m with and committed to at the moment.
I don’t believe in religion per se. I think most religions just try to control you rather than actually allow you to be free. I suppose it makes me angry about religions rejecting people because they sleep with the same sex or something like that. I find that quite intolerable and hypocritical. If religion’s not there to profess love for your fellow person, then I can’t see the point of it.
I think there are a lot of aspects about certain religions like Buddhism that one can look at and take a lot from. I’m not one to stand on ceremony for anything. In terms of spirituality, I think it’s important to look within yourself, to try to find something that’ s bit higher than yourself, but however you do it, I think it’s also a fluid thing. I don’t have any strict views upon anything really. Just take life as it comes and hope I can cope with it as best I can and do as much good as I can.
I see myself as a good person. I’m a very social person and I have a lot of friends. I think I just live my life as well as I can. I see myself as considerate of other people in this world and I need to fit into this world as best I can, with all its permutations and combinations. I think it’s really important to be somebody who isn’t afraid to be who they are, especially if you are with another woman. I think there’s still a lot of prejudice against lesbians and gays out there and it is important to me, to be someone who’s not afraid to show that they’re with the same sex. I’ve always had a lot of friends and it’s never been a problem, so I think it obviously works to be the person I am, and do the things I do. I really enjoy myself.
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